My Very Exclusive Clique

For all birds of a feather

(yes, I mean you. Don't even attempt to try the old trick of looking around.)

My very exclusive clique
Such an assorted bunch you’ll ever meet
Mostly workaholics
Thankfully no real alcoholics
Or such hardworking drunkards you’ll likely never to meet.

Kel. 4 September 2005.


Yours truly knows she has done a brief introduction to my clique previously, but people change, I change, etc, and so the composition of “My Very Exclusive Clique” changes with time as well. This is not to say that the core members change but to admit a fact of life. Sometimes people drift apart; sometimes new friends come along. *shrug*

Having said that, please do not be mistaken, the core members of my clique remains the same, of course, it won’t dare be otherwise, I won’t let it be otherwise.

Okay, before I go on to give my friends a more elaborate introduction; let me first make a qualifier:

The people yours truly introduces in this particular blog is not the entirety of “My Very Exclusive Clique” that was the derivative of the “Mean Club” yours truly founded with some friends in junior college, but more of an introduction to my closer friends and more importantly, people who has been or will be featured or referred to in my blog. One of them is not even part of my clique.

There are 2 other persons who yours truly is inclined to include but decide not to as they really need not much introduction, ie, *Starry & *Wallflower, who has been more or less been around for almost the entirety of my blogging duration.

Btw, fyi, yours truly is horrified to announce that she has succumbed to blogging for a full year come September 11. *gasp*. So think of this as a commemorate yours truly's evil blog birthday.

:::

“Insulting each other is too passe. We must unite to insult others”
~ *private

“We are suckers for things that are hip. If Satan is hip, we would probably convert to Satanism”.
~ *eccentric

“Guilt without actions is just a waste of time”.
~ *snappish

“You think it’s so easy to act bimbotic? Need effort one you know”.
~ *witchy

“People who are goody two shoes in this life must have been totally evil in their previous lives”.
~ *wicked

“I’m going to come back as a dung beetle” “No, I think I’m coming back as a toilet brush”.
~ *Candid

“I’m very proud of my excuse to call him. If you ever need an excuse to contact a guy, I’ll help come up with good ones”.
~ *Peace

“……..”
~ *doormat

“Our friendship are laid on the foundation of lots and lots of food”.
~ yours truly

:::

Where should yours truly start? Should I begin from the beginning on how each of us met? But really, I doubt anyone is so free as to be interested in our humble meetings? *archly* What? You are really so free and really interested? Yours truly is horrified. Go do something more worthwhile & useful! *shoo*

Ok. After chasing away the interested (read: really really odd) readers, yours truly decide to keep the introduction minimal. After all, the quotable quotes by them already says so much about them. (Stop whining *doormat, yours truly will not be whined into quoting something you said. After all, what better represent a doormat than silence? Yes?).

The Founding of the Core of My Very Exclusive Clique

Once upon a time, when yours truly was less cold-hearted and evil, she met *eccentric in a current affairs history class. Back in those time, *eccentric with her long hair and obedient (which was deceiving, by the way) appearance was quite jarring in a current affairs class, although this was probably yours truly’s own biased stereotyping of students in current affairs class. Anyway, yours truly in a moment of *absentmindedness, befriended *eccentric and that was the start of our longstanding karma (read: strange and even stranger. Think Chinese idiom – yuan nie).

Anyway, we discovered after enduring the initial boring get-to-know-you stage, that we got along despite our outward differences and the really contrasting impression we gave to others (imagine we had people ask us “you two are friends?” *roll eyes* No, we’re really enemies but we happen to attend class, have lunch and go out together. *laconic*).

Anyway, in this period of acquaintanceship, *eccentric befriended a girl from her maths class who she loved to harass (yes, harass) such that eventually the poor gal aka *snappish was inevitably drawn into our evil clutches. Did I mention that *snappish had to drop maths later on? See, the influence our evilness has on others. Don't bother wasting your sympathies on *snappish, she's definitely one of us. And this gave her the perfect excuse to blame *eccentric for her own inability to continue to struggle with maths. Besides, this meant that she could drop maths in favor of spending time slacking with us. No competition at all. Yes?

Concurrently when *eccentric was harassing *snappish, yours truly was not idle. I was trying to get another steady looking and quiet classmate into our evil clutches, so enter *private into our threesome at that point. Boy, was we deceived. *deadpan* The steady looking and quiet classmate turned out to have an arsenal of sharp wits (ouch!) and hidden depths. Yours truly totally blame her poker faced and plead not guilty for getting her into our threesome & as our eventual mean club president. And so begins the roots to “our very exclusive clique”.

:::

Okay, remembrances aside, yours truly will briefly insult, (did I say insult? I meant introduce, of course) my closer friends.

*Eccentric is the idealistic and creative one, with the aesthetics sense and really quirky ideas. She is the one who comes up with the themes and funky stuff to do for every massive birthday celebrations we have had for our very exclusive clique. She’s one of yours truly’s ideal travel companion. Ask her about her alternate universe ideal if you doubt her eccentricity. *archly*

*Private, yours truly think, needs no further introduction. She has sharp wits, poker face, confidence and is intensely private. She also has great aesthetics sense & good with her hands and has a flair for languages. What more needs to be said?

*Snappish is of course, already introduced. After all, who else in yours truly’s exclusive clique has the ability to bring about the visitation of Mr Green Eye Monster? She is, yours truly is glad to report, getting darker and more layered. Not implying that she is getting dangerously dark or that she was depthless before (yours truly won’t dare imply as such given the snappish looks she’s already throwing at me) but that her work requires a certain amount of (a) keeping up with current affairs and (b) keeping secrets. Teasing her is one of yours truly & *eccentric’s pet fun. *whispers*

*Witchy, is as always, the bubbly and overly sentimental bimbo. But of course, intelligent too. All of yours truly’s friends are intelligent, who dares to suggest otherwise? *sternly* She is great at writing animated emails. No one writes kinetic emails/sms the way she does. Trust me. Yours truly has exacting taste. *dryly*

*Wicked is newly caught into our evil clutches. She is a long time friend of *eccentric and prior to her fall into our clutches, the film companion of yours truly and *eccentric. She is really really unique. Think oddball and quirky. Her opinions and analogies are usually jarringly unique yet strangely wise (probably more strange than wise, but hey, we all have our flaws). Teasing her is also great fun especially since her retorts are surprising & funny unlike *private, who one can only tease at your own peril. *shake head* Why can’t my friends be *dumber. *deadpan*

*Candid is not in “My Very Exclusive Clique” but yours truly can’t resist including her cos her humor and wits are quick and interesting and blunt. She also has a quite cosmopolitan family, reflective of herself. Yours truly has never come across anyone else who speaks English with a Canadian accent, Mandarin with a Shanghaiese accent and Cantonese like a Hongkonger. Have you? I rest my case. *archly*

*Peace is as her nick suggests, calm, compassionate and strong. But she has a tinge of melancholy in her but hey, given her experience & background, yours truly dare you to say you would emerge as well-adjusted as her. She’s a great listener, entertaining/funny storyteller & most importantly, an admirable therapist. *solemnly*

*Doormat is a paradox of down-to-earth earthliness mixed with surprising lack of pragmatism. She seems malleable but manages to retain her core centre so on yours truly less evil days, (and this happens to be one given my recent promotion at work) I'll say she's adaptable. A somewhat study in contradiction. As she has already had a blog dedicated to her, what more needs to be said except that she is a serious chong-se-qing-you person ie, loosely translated as boyfriend before friends person. *reprimanding look*

So if anyone actually manages to read till this part, yes, yes, yours truly's clique is made up of assorted group of weirdos. So sue me. *arched my brows*

Did you notice that yours truly only wrote on 8 individuals? The cooperative word here is individual. After all, most people are lambs and part of the herd. *grimace*

Perhaps, if yours truly was either more discriminating or less exacting, I would have more friends?

I think

Not.

Insultingly yours,
Evil me.